brianna.org

unreal

January 30, 2004

1) Today’s surreal moment: receiving copies of the mydoom virus spoofed from an address from a company I haven’t worked for in seven years. It is odd to see brianna@nameofcompany.com sending me mail. Who on earth has that address in their book who would be silly enough to download this virus?

2) Recruiters submitted me to two companies. One behemoth financial corporation that needs a real and true interface designer who has spent one third of a lifetime studying interface guidelines for operating systems and sitting in focus groups listening to people say “It’s just not…usable”. That would be me. I’m that interface designer. The other company is much smaller, looking for a web designer with Access experience. I can already see my future there as full of hassles, since developers only use Access as a web database solution when either they don’t know what they are doing, or are forced to by some middle manager. So…I have an interview with the second company lined up. First company hasn’t responded.
Knowing myself, I will likely say something blunt to the recruiter like “Well, I want to hold out for the first company. More money, and it’s larger, so I’m guaranteed to not be bothered when I’m playing Unreal tournament with my boyfriend during my lunch hour.” That should go over well.

But seriously. If I’m going to bother to get back into this, I want to work at the big huge company where I can avoid office politics just through sheer numbers (I can’t possibly piss EVERYONE off when I only have eight hours a day and two thousand people to talk to) and where all my experience will be put to good use, rather than twiddling my thumbs making banner ads and playing in Access. I can do that at home, and be naked at the same time.

3) I have needed comfort, so I have been lolling around Bombay Company’s website while I’m supposed to be working. I wish I could find a place that makes clothing that is as lush and colorful as Bombay Co.’s furniture and only slightly overpriced decorative items. I found a chess set there today that totally inspired me to make my own version out of polymer clay. Sounds a little ersatz, I know, but I have actually done this before. I sculpted a chess set out of polymer clay when I was fifteen. Little mushrooms for pawns, tree stumps for rooks, a wizard for the king, and several other pieces that I totally don’t remember, since I left the chess set with the girl who supplied the clay. We used a lot of clay, I felt it was only fair. At any rate, everyone who saw it totally loved it (or I just remember it that way) and I’ve been wanting to make another more ornate one with a chessboard ever since. I should probably do that. I’ve got all the stuff…

4) I am very thankful for my friends this week, and for J. My best friend K. told me “Brianna, I know you are capable and will work hard to get yourself ahead, even if it means delaying your plans for a couple of years. And at the end of it, you will add even more depth and brilliance to your art. You deserve that.” And it was nice to hear. J. has been amiable and loving all week. Plus, he sat around at the mall for an hour holding my purse while I got my haircut and shopped at the Pink Bordello (Victoria’s Secret), so he earned some Brownie points. That was twice that I received support from a friend when I wasn’t looking.

And then you guys did the same, so I’m feeling the love.

I’m afraid if I stop writing, the phone will ring and it will be a recruiter saying “Big financial behemoth isn’t interested, but tiny Access company can’t wait to sign you on!” and then I’ll be forced to cry into my tea and suck it up and take the position. Keep fingers crossed, please.

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